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This Week In Hollywood Shitlording

So, is it just me, or does it seem like you can’t get on the web these days and go from page to page without tripping over some interstitial essay about racist and sexist casting decisions? Is this just the wake of the Oscars playing out, or is this the new status quo? I can only hope for the former while begrudgingly accepting that it is almost certainly the latter, as posts about racial and gender oppression still garner huge amounts of traffic in this outrage and victim loving culture we’ve created.

#OscarsSoWhite – The Aftermath

As you may or may not have heard, this year represented the second year in a row that no minorities were nominated for Oscars (or at least the specific Oscars people actually care about, read: acting/directing) some have ran the numbers on the representation in terms of population demographics, and some argue that the results are not as bad as you’ve been led to believe. These numbers, however, become a lot less charitable towards the academy if you go back more than 20 years, or if you look at it from a more non-black minority perspective (Asians, Latinos, Natives).

Personally, the first question that comes to mind is why do people care so much? I haven’t watched the Oscars in years. This year they had the lowest ratings in eight years – and honestly, what did they expect hiring a black MC. Oh relax, it’s a joke, I love Chris Rock, and no I’m not going to site here and try to argue that Hollywood casts more white actors in leads because it’s what’s best for the revenue…maybe it is, maybe it isn’t, I just honestly don’t give a shit.

That’s part of the problem I guess I have with trying to analyze this stuff, my brother pointed it out to me recently in a conversation where he said, ‘ya, but you aren’t racist’. It’s true, I’m one of those crazy people that was taught in my youth that the concept of ‘color blindness’ was one to aspire to. That shit made sense to me back then and it still makes sense today. Maybe that’s why instead of sitting around complaining that there isn’t enough Asians in Hollywood, I just regularly download movies that were made in China, Thailand and elsewhere. Honestly, what’s so hard about that? Some of the best movies come out of East Asia. So what’s the problem?

The problem is people are still, somehow, against all evidence to the contrary, obsessed with the idea that culture shapes society, and not vise-versa. Or, more pointedly, that Hollywood and the games industry should be tools for social engineering and not capitalist driven industries that answer only to the free market. People see the movies as a way to cure racism, video games as a way to end violence, music as a way to end misogyny, and so on and so forth. Of course, they have no real evidence to support these claims, and I dare you to try to present me with some.

It’s almost as if the average, rational human being is able to differentiate between the fantasy world they experience when they go and watch something like Disney’s Aladdin
and that little thing I like to call real life. This, in my humble estimation, is one of the most overlooked failings of the social justice crowd, their patronizing propensity to assume that the rest of the world is so much dumber then they are as to require lessons on morality from Vin Diesel and Lara Croft.

The sad truth is that the social justice crowd is poisoning the well completely when it comes to any merit based award that has an element of subjectivity involved. Why am I suppose to care who wins what, if the people doing the voting have to worry about being called racist? Or sexist? Seriously, if a minority wins best actor next year at the Oscars, who can honestly say they will not question, at least in the back of their minds, how much that had to do with all this blathering about representation? 2016 has become literally the shittiest year to win an Oscar as a minority. Thanks, GamerGate.

family guy guide to oscar nominations 2016Is this what you want the Oscars to become?

Blackface? Not even once

Nina Simone

The Nina Simone biopic trailer released this week, and of course people are pissed off, because as mentioned above, that’s what movie trailers are for these days. Nina’s daughter has slammed the film as being a false representation of her mother, which in all fairness is a newsworthy thing to write about.┬áLisa Simone Kelly also defended Zoe Saldana, the actress playing Nina in the film. Why would she have to do that, you ask? Because the actress is being panned all over the internet for resuscitating black face.

This is stupid on so many levels. First of all, as pointed out by Nina’s Daughter, why are people going after Zoe? Do they think she has final call on all these decisions, or that she should have passed up what may be the role of a lifetime for her, because of how people would react to the make-up decisions? Please. People are mad because Zoe is only half black. They be like, bitch you ain’t black enough. Motherfuckers be absolutely obsessed with skin tone.

Secondly, this isn’t blackface. I can’t believe I have to explain this to anyone, but I will. The reason blackface is so offensive is because it is done mockingly. It’s entire intention is to poke fun at black people (heaven forbid). That’s obviously not what is going on here. Apparently you just can’t put makeup on a black character, full stop. That’s what I’m reading from all this. What you gotta do is put out one of those tone pallette things, and cast the person who most looks like the character you want to portray, which makes way more sense then choosing the person that gives the best audition or some other such nonsense. I mean, take that family guy image above, which is obviously a joke, and tell me that’s not how these people are viewing the audition process at this point.

This is the same shit as when people complained about Rami Malek (aka Mr. Robot) being cast in Night of The Museum for not being Egyptian enough. Y’all are some racist motherfuckers.

As for the film not telling Nina’s true story, that’s a sad reality of biopics that all people must come to recognize. They will always focus more on drama and less on the music, because that’s what sells tickets, unfortunately. As a lifelong fan of Nina’s music I will definitely be watching the film while at the same time knowing that it isn’t a documentary.


Marvel's Iron Fist

And finally we get to the story I really wanted to talk about today, because it really speaks to the levels of madness that society has achieved when it comes to casting for film and television. People are well pissed that a white actor got cast to play a white character. Wait, what?

Yes, you read that correctly, actor Finn Jones who plays Loras Tyrell on Game Of Thrones has been cast as Iron Fist for the upcoming Netflix series. Iron what now, you say? Yes, Iron Fist, a lesser known Marvel character that is getting the Netflix treatment. The character is, and always has been, white. But here’s the catch, this character is proficient in Kung-Fu and therefor, according to Vox, it is “a disappointing shock [to those] who hoped that Marvel might take the opportunity to cast an Asian or Asian-American actor as Iron Fist”.

Because only Asian’s are good at KungFu, right? Wrong! Haven’t you people seen Bloodsport? But seriously, this, in the same week when people are pissing and moaning because Chris Rock made a joke at the Oscars about Asians being good at math. Ermagherd stereotypes. Also lol @ people that whine about a child labor joke but you would still have to pry their smartphones from their cold dead hands.

Make up your mind, stereotypes are awful, or they are what we should use to determine casting. Seriously, make up your mind because you can’t have it both ways.

Again, not to beat a dead horse, but there are plenty of awesome movies that come out of East Asia, so why not just watch them and enjoy what you claim to crave so desperately instead of pissing and moaning like it doesn’t exist. That’s what I do. Oh I forgot, it’s not actually about you getting to see yourself represented on screen, but rather some social engineering conspiracy theory you cling to that the western media is oppressing Asians (arguably the most privileged racial group in America).

Also, I just want to shout out and congratulate Finn Jones. I said on Facebook a couple years ago that he deserved an Emmy for what he was doing on Game of Thrones, and that was before he showed off his range and the character got all dark, good ol’ comic relief Loras was under appreciated in my opinion and it’s nice to see him getting more opportunities to flex.

Movie Guide News slams American Gods, Retracts


And so on and so forth…

London Has Fallen is terror porn. Ghostbusters is racist because the black character doesn’t have an IQ of 180. Zootopia is an example of how to properly treat racism in film, which might actually be true – just not for the reasons everyone is claiming. I will be shortly writing a full post on Zootopia so stay tuned for that.

Remember when movies where just an excuse to turn off your brain for a couple hours? I miss those days already.


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